I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
