awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
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