Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
