Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
