Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
