the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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