you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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