Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
