Did you just see the Batmobile???
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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