Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
