Christians are straight up FREAKS
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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