I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize