theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
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