Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
