be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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