No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
