I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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