marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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