If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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