do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
How's work?
Spinning.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
