Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
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