There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
