I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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