My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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