you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Randomize
