They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Actions speak louder than pants.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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