I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize
