living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
