how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I have fence marks all over my body
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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