I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
