Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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