seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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