I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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