Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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