my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
