OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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