Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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