Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
only if we run a train.
done.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
