would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
It's never too late to be topless.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
