i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
