I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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