when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Duck Duck Cougar?
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
