I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
