doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
