This dress was meant to end up on your floor
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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