Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
