I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
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