In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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