What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
