keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
